Darkness and light

I am a sober thirty something woman and I want to share my story. I had spent twenty years hiding from my life at the bottom of a bottle until I decided enough was enough. I don’t have all the answers about staying sober, but if this blog helps someone else, it’s worth doing. Actually, even if I have no readers, it’s worth doing, because it’ll help me stay sober.

It’s hard to pin point when I started thinking about getting sober. I didn’t lose my job, I still had my friends and family. I had actually bought a house during my last year of drinking. But, something was missing. I have heard it described so many times in podcasts and twelve step meetings, that sometimes it seems to lose its meaning, but for me it rings true. I had a hole in my soul. I’ve been sober for almost eight months now and at times I still have that hole. Or, as I sometimes refer to it, my dark passenger. That’s my depression, my anxiety, my dark and twisty thoughts. But, it’s not there every day. And when I’m not drinking, I can climb my way out of the darkness.

This blog is going to be dark and honest and gutsy, but I hope there will be pockets of light throughout. Because this is a blog about life, warts and all, with some hope sprinkled in.

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